When a person is not actually in front of you, it is human nature to be presumptuous about them. When you’re dating online, you’re not really ‘real’ no matter how verified your account is, how many pics you have uploaded or how detailed a bio you have provided.
The other person must take your word for the authenticity of information you have provided. Lacking to ensure trust in the other person’s mind will eventually lead to failures.
But don’t worry, we’re here to help. It’s simply a matter of knowing the demographics. With millions of people dating online, your chances of finding your special someone is quite high.
Just avoid these 7 common mistakes and find success in online dating.
#1: Avoid Names That Invoke Negative Associations
It’s unfortunate if your name is prone to humor or sarcasm, but if it is you must avoid showing it on your profile. If your first name is Dick and you last name is Weiner, do yourself a favor, avoid using either one of them or no one will take you seriously. It’s not your fault, it’s not your parents’ either. It’s just that the times are not right for it. (They never were!)Similarly some other names and last names to avoid are names that are easy to rhyme with body parts like Mangina or which may suggest double meanings like Small, Butt etc. You’ve been to school…you can figure it out can’t you?
Use some playful nick names like flirty, iceman etc. I read this one case study where a 28 year old guy named Mike changed his username from Mike 1679 to ‘MikeinShiningArmor’ and the ladies started jumping on him. Remember men prefer profile names that suggest physical beauty like cutie, hottie etc., while women prefer something that point to their personality.
#2: Avoid Posting Only Narcissistic Selfies
Post lively photos of yourself but that don’t mean you have to always be by yourself. It is not a turn off if you post a group photo with your friends once in a while. Your profile picture should be a close up of your naturally smiling face but don’t overdo it with the selfies. When taking photos with a group of friends, ask that one clingy friend of the opposite sex to keep it down a notch. If a girl posts a picture of her guy friend wrapping his arms around her waist, it might send the wrong message. But on the contrary, women actually adore a man who gets smiles from other women; it tells her that he is charming and likable to the ladies.
#3: Avoid Sending Flirty First Messages
When you find your match, you often try too hard to seal the deal at the first attempt. Don’t. It’s doesn’t work that way and you’ll probably end up at square one again. It’s good to avoid sending ‘winks’ or sexy messages. Instead send a short message which is honest from the heart and suggests that you’re not a desperate person. As the conversation begins, slowly start exploring and do not send long ass erudite messages unless you know that the other person is into that.
#4: No Lies and No Fluffs
Write your profile summary using simple language and avoid trying to sound extra intelligent. Don’t be a showoff. Contrary to popular belief, the majority of women do not prefer a showoff, especially when dating online. Definitely do not lie or write the common bluffs that no one buys. Use a humorous approach and keep it artless. Your lies and fictional information will only come back to haunt you two meet in real life.
Don’t be too eager to flash your accomplishments and qualifications. Just give out necessary information. Remember, likeability does not depend on your academics. Honesty does.
#5: Avoid Leaving Your Profile Unfinished
Take the time and fill out your complete profile. A lot of people would read your profile before connecting with you and so should you. The profile is supposed to give the other person clues on who you are and it’ll also attract other people with common interests. Give out some specifics. Answer the compatibility questions, it makes it easier for the site to make match suggestions.
Sending a first message with a simple “hey” is not gonna work. Mundane questions like favorite movies, hobbies don’t go very far either. Instead try to learn some specifics about the person and send a quirky comment on that or ask a question on it. It’ll help you to instantly launch an interesting conversation and make a connection.
Make sure to use the swipe right(like) feature religiously and take the match percentages seriously, they are quite scientific and they mostly work.
#6: Don’t Ask Why Someone Is Using This Site/app
Don’t be an askhole and ask banal questions like “why are you using this site/app?” The answer is pretty obvious isn’t it? You wouldn’t use Tinder to order pizza now would you? The question is very annoying and will instantly put off many people. Mostly men have a tendency of doing this. Also do not ask if they’re doing well here. You’re not taking a freaking survey.
These conversations come up when you have nothing to talk about mostly. This is when my previous advice of reading the person’s profile helps. If you’ve read each other’s profile, you’ll have some clues on what to talk about.
#7: Don’t Make A List Of “Don’ts”
This is a red flag straight away. Do not make a list of don’ts in your profile. You don’t want someone who’s clingy, you don’t want someone who’s horny, you don’t want someone who’s short, you don’t want someone who’s traditional – save the drama for your mama! If you put out so many stipulations, people will prefer to avoid you. When a person makes a list of things he or she does not want in a person, it sends out the message that he or she rides a high horse. Don’t be that guy. Instead make of list of things and traits you do want in your potential partner.
Online dating will connect you with thousands of likeminded people; the least you can do is be open-minded. Approach every situation with positivity, tolerance and some sense of humor; you’ll become a good catch in no time.